Meanwhile, on Instagram…

Meanwhile, on Instagram…

We all know a handful of celebrities. No, not like Rihanna’s and disney starlets. I mean those random people you meet at warehouse parties in Bushwick that have tens of thousands of followers. And you never know that they do until you follow them later. Like, how does a croissant picture get 356 likes? And I’m out here half naked for a mere 80 likes and a concerned phone call from a family member.

And you know what’s even crazier? I’ll go to the cafe with them. I’ll watch them order the croissant. The food styling takes about 15 minutes, and it is scientific in it’s angles. And then the photography. 26 photos of one almond croissant in a Lower East Side bakery, and the final image has been chosen. Editorials at Vogue are dim in comparison to this french pastry. And finally- the filter. Oh yes, even baked goods need the right saturation. Once the caption has been decided on, and grammar triple checked, the upload button is pressed and now the world can see this beautiful, flaky golden brown piece of bread their favorite blogger paid 9 dollars for.

And then the blogger throws it away. “Oh, I can’t eat that. I have a gluten allergy. So tell me about this new guy, hello!!!” she says to me. Meanwhile, on Instagram people scroll through her feed wondering how someone can eat so many carbs and still look like Athena and a prima ballerina made a love child and raised her to wear pastels so well. And the answer is Lo-Fi.